Very Shortened list of Bar Laws.................the quick read before you go out tonight.

1. Never borrow lighters
2. Never give your phone number to the bartender
3. Never agree to be wing man/woman unless you know how to get rid of people
4. Always carry lipgloss and a powder compact
5. Always go to crowded venues (if you don't, you will be a target of atleast three ugly males there)
6. Do NOT try to sing the words of a song you do not know (this applies to every drunk girl thinking she knows the words to More than a Feeling when, clearly, she does not)
7. Never hit on the band member while he's on stage. Seriously, don't try it.
8. Ok, this is a rough subject, but, ladies please. If you are seriously overweight, do not try and pull off a mini skirt with leggings. That's bad.
9. There is a difference between classy cleaveage and porn star cleaveage. FYI: classy-good     porn star-bad
10. It is ok to kiss the boy toys you just met in a bar. Sometimes. But it is never ok to go home with some guy you just met, dear.
11. When enjoying the karaoke, you must never think you are Mariah Carey. No matter WHAT your bestie tells you. Unless of course, you are Mariah Carey.
12. Free beer is good. Free shots are good. Free mixies are good.
13. When a guy offers you free shots, beer and mixies all together that's bad. And you may want to keep your drink with you.
14. Never get on stage with the band. Ever. Even if it is your birthday. Trust me.
15. Get the guy. Get the drinks. Then get outta there. Never give your real phone number. Ever.
16. Learn the man rules of bar flirting so you know what you are up against. They have wing men/women too. So be careful.
17. Never consider going to a different bar WITH a guy. You may go by yourself or your bestie. But you will not go with a guy. This means, in his head, that you are there with him. (essentially ruining the "walk" through the front door)........which is where you make your first impressions.
18. Guys watch the door for prospects. Some men have finally figured out, if a girl comes in with a guy, she's taken. That's why I recommend taking your brother/male cousin with you to a bar if you want to go out but you both want to avoid being hit on.
19. I cannot fully stress this point enough. Do NOT borrow lighters......(seriously, just wear something with pockets so you don't lose yours.)
20. Stuffing things in your bra is sooo 1985 grandma style. You may have nice tatas. But that doesn't mean that the bartender wants to touch money you pull out of your sweaty underboob. Seriously, ladies. Let's be classy....not trashy.
21. If for some reason you think you may be wanting to give him your real phone number.......don't. I don't care...........Don't.